....snowed under

Sorry for the lack of action around these parts lately. Been very busy getting your orders done. Haven't had time to update properly but I shall be back with some cool shit including a how to pictorial tutorial on how to achieve the screen accurate paint finish (if you are so inclined, but be warned, it is more fragile than a house of cards in a hurricane). Normal service shall be resumed shortly but I shall be Tweeting so feel free to follow me. Adieu for now my online chums.

....but I'm not Tony Stark!

Something made me chuckle today.

It was a review left by a customer this morning and it contained a little amusing vignette alluding to a scene from the Ironman movie that could very easily have been played out between Russ Brown and Neill Gorton:

Russ Brown: Mr Gorton, Sir, we've explored what you've asked of us and it seems as though there's a little hiccup. Actually, um...

Neil Gorton: A hiccup?



Russ Brown: Yes, see to make the sonic make sound... sir, the technology doesn't actually exist. So it...



Neil Gorton: Wait, wait, the technology? [gestures towards a CO toy] Russ, Russ... here is the technology! I've asked you to simply make it smaller.



Russ Brown: Yes, sir, and that's what we're trying to do, but... honestly, it's impossible-



Neil Gorton: [yelling] CT WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAVE! WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!



Russ Brown: Well, I'm sorry. I'm not CT.

 
I didn't intend to rake up old ground but this was very amusing and very flattering. Just thought I'd share. Thanks Jonathan!

Extreme Quality Control

Today I shrunk myself and had a walk around the body of the sonic screwdriver in order to examine each and every crackle:

Eleventh for 11....Eleventh Doctor Sonic Screwdriver Update

You will remember back in May I posted confirmation I would make an Eleventh Doctor Sonic:

http://celestialtoystore.blogspot.com/2010/05/eleventh-doctor-sonic.html

You will also recall that my Tweets around that period detailed the headfuck I went through trying to reverse engineer this thing. Up until that point everything I had seen about this prop including it's appearances on chat shows and in public lead me to believe that this prop was in no way replicable as a consumer-grade replica. It simply is not engineered enough and will break at the slightest hint of abuse. I understand that Matt Smith broke this prop countless times through 'flicking' it open. The prop, as I understand it, is just not designed to withstand this kind of continual abuse. On-set, these props have a full time minder: a big chap from the art department whose raison d'etre is to be the custodian of this prop and make running repairs and make sure that the thing is in tip top shape for every take:

Now obviously our replica - in fact, NO replica of this prop by anyone - can be 100% screen accurate in construction and materials to the prop without it coming with the services of the gentleman above. And whilst it may tickle your funny bone to have a chap like that tagging along with spare parts, lube and a real screwdriver everytime you take your 11th sonic for a walk, the novelty will, I assure you, quite quickly wear very thin indeed. Indeed, having seen Season 5 in its entirety, I have come to the disappointing conclusion that this prop is not quite the  high quality piece it first appeared.

Well for the best part of the past three months I have agonised over design of this and I have studied every screenshot and pic of the prop available together with the remarkably good CO toy version and it does appear that this prop has some serious design and construction flaws and that these flaws are not as apparent onscreen due to the existence of multiple props, possibly 2 or 3, that are rotated to give the illusion of a single prop.

The good news is that I have figured out exactly how the prop is constructed, the limitations of the design, the flaws and the precise dimensions, in as much as can be done when there are multiple props that appear to look substatially different from each other. What this means is that I will be totally re-engineering the prop to eliminated or reduce the design flaws, keep the overall dimensions aand proportions screen accurate, yet make a durable consumer grade prop replica that improves on the prop but still retains the same outward aesthetics. Basically, I'm going to make a screen accurate prop only better :-)

A lot of people have often asked the methodology I use to create near perfect replicas from only visual material and the secret is that yes, I do have a secret methodology that draws upon several disciplines underlined with common sense, deduction and logic. There's also a healthy dose of savantism at work too. The truth of the matter is that the method, however powerful, is unimportant and is utter secondary to the end result and QED, will result in some pretty amazing results as you will see. Blueprints have been made, the CAD model is being built and thanks to those of you that have sent in reference material, I am in a position to create what I feel could be the finest replica of its kind. I shall be further working on the design and blueprints over the coming months as there are several things that need to be sourced. I shall be using copper look anodised aluminium, Corian, artificial jade, raw aluminium, brass and leather for my build and will be looking at building my first prototype as soon as I have some spare time, possibly after SDCC in a couple of weeks.

Tennant Sonic Videos Up

I have been bugged, pestered and cajoled and I've finally had a few moments to relent and film some quick and dirty vids of the Tennant sonic for you. Please note that the color is GREY. It looks a bit yellowish as the lights in my office at 2am are fluorescent and very yellow and the white balance on my Nokia does not handle fluorescent light too well. You'll note I have made a small adjustment to the acrylic neck and deliberately made the bore channel sloppy and scratchy with no oil. On camera it now looks identical to the Tennant neck.

Now let me get back to work you bunch of demanding slave drivers.

Ok, I'm going to take this slow.....

Phez made this observation about my prop:

"Like why is the head connected to the slide totally different than the screen used ones? Even the plastic background piece this is based on is not like that."

Now I like to think my grasp of the English language is far from tenuous but even a wordsmith of my calibre cannot decipher this garbled mess.

However, Phez has made himself clearer.

He subsequently posted this:

"You guys I am not trying to debunk the guys props. He did a great job on it period. I am dropping the photo proof question because it just does not matter. Here is what I am talking about. The tube that goes up the center of the headpiece one size all the way through. In the photo (and all of them I have seen) all around where the tube goes into the tip (and the body end of the head) is a flat surface. If you look at the replica on the first page of this thread you can see the rings where two sides of that pin are bigger where they screw in from the center post on the bottom and go into the tip of the unit.

It is a small detail and was probably just another design decision no doubt like the slider was so you could replace the LED or something. Not a big deal."

It's a decent enough question which I have covered previously, but I'll cover it again with much the same patience that a remedial kid needs.

 

Ok. The construction on mine is based on the Penny Howarth made hero prop. The prop picture above is the Aztec 'static' prop (it actually wasn't that static, it can slide in and out).

 

In any case, the way my prop fits together is that the LED sits in an LED holder and the head cage slides on and screws into the ball. This featured a circular join at the base of the head recess below the centre pipe.

Look here at a shot of the Tennant prop from the Visual Dictionary:

The pencil is pointing to the join I refer to. There is also a join on the upper part of the inner recess too. This is where the ball join screws into the emitter head cage. Here is the head without the emitter cage screwed in showing the LED holder:

Mr Jedibugs also reminded me of something else that will confirm I am correct in my observations and engineering:

This picture clearly shows the large upper aperture where an LED holder, such as on mine will fit into. This aperture is clearly larger than the diameter of the central pipe.

Ok, some caveats here. I do not know if ALL the props including the Tennant one had this construction (but based on the above DK pic I know at least one did). I suspect that the hero props do as there were only 4 to 6 heads (including the 3 Aztec heads that I know DO NOT have this construction) ever made that were constantly recycled and mounted onto different bodies. I also cannot say 100% this construction is actually correct as I never took apart the prop. I can tell you that externally, my replica looks identical with the correct joins, the rest I engineered using common sense principles of design, including the LED holder.

For next week's lesson Mr Phez, please bring along some chewing gum. I'll teach you how to chew it.

Edit: Einstein Phez has tried to argue his case by presenting the following two pictures as proof of the absence of the LED holder:

Firstly, the top picture can be discounted as it is the Aztec prop. The second pic is the prop I had access to.

Let me state that the tolerance between the LED holder and the head cage is tiny. Thousandths of a millimeter. The seam is virtually invisible and that close tolerance has practical problems such as galling and thermal expansion (which I solved by making the tolerance larger). Having stated that, let's look at the pics.

Here's a closeup of the head of the second pic:

Can't see anything? Look a bit closer:

See it now? If not, here's the same pic with contrast turned up:

See what I mean? Look and all shall be revealed. I think this what you call, getting 'pwned', lolololol.

The turd that won't flush

Once upon a time, not so long ago in fact, I was sitting in a bar on The Bund in Shanghai (a delightful stretch of waterfront to those of you worldly enough to make the trip out to this part of the world, yellow peril bedamned), shooting the breeze over a couple of Tsingtao with an old chum of mine. Now this chum was a sagacious sort, the type of ex-pat British civil servant identikit construct that usually frequents ex-colonial establishments constantly bemoaning the demise of the British Empire and refers to me as his WOG compadre. As archetypal as he may have been (and he was - he wore a fucking Pith helmet for chrissake), he has a very cutting and quite elegant way of looking at the world. On this occasion I was on one of my rare bouts of loathing just about everyone but on this particular afternoon, I excelled myself and hated on the entire human race. I remarked, after about the eight beer of that particularly torpid session, that 'the entire human race is, in fact, shit'. Without batting an eyelid, my sagacious ex-pat chum replied 'That may be the case, CT old boy, but one must aim to be the turd that floats'.

Now where is this leading, the deafening question I hear resounding before me? Well, I had to have drawn that conclusion from somewhere and from something, or more pointedly, from someone.

Many candidates spring to mind, and many of them I have featured on this very blog, but tonight I have had the misfortune of encountering an imbecile of such distinction that crimes against common sense and reason that have been perpetrated prior to this epiphanic moment by lesser imbeciles pale into comparison to the utter tosh that has manifested itself tonight.

Who, I hear you all collectively clamour, is this wingnut?

Come a bit closer and I shall tell you....

He calls himself 'Phez' and is a prime example of what Stephen King refered to as a 'child of the corn' and through his sycophantism, has done more to damage the tarnished image of Midwesterners being inbred numbnuts than Britney Spears ever could. This tool managed to put down his pitchfork and banjo for long enough to type the following missive on the RPF:

[my response in red]

"This is still going huh

Er....actually it wasn't until you decided to stick your oar in.

Why doesn't CT just produce one or two pictures of the screen used Sonic that are NOT publicly available (that he took while examining the real Sonic). You can not tell me that some insider said "take all of the measurements with a caliper etc... that you want but do not bring a camera". There is absolutely no way that a single photo could get a secret source in trouble and would be one single shred of proof other than saying "I had access but can not say how due to legal issues".

You really, really, really must think I'm thick or something. I have no need to prove anything to you. My product speaks for itself. I have put out a challenge to Neill, to the BBC, to Nick fucking Robatto to prove that my dimensions are off. You can't. So are you saying that the MFX dimensions are correct? They're not and if any MFX owner wishes to test this contention, I am more than happy to fund a court case to this end. Everyone knows I have had access to the prop because my sonic matches up in every single dimension. Ultimately, whether I had access or whether MFX had access is moot because what one does with that access, and the product one produces with this data, is more important than prop access argument. You're just a childish little cunt who is just trying to hang on to whatever sliver of high ground you think you have. It's pathetic and transparent and so are you. Just fucking grown up, you wanker.

I would believe the guy if there was ANY evidence at all to back it up, any. I do not care if a story makes sense, sounds reasonable, or follows a timeline. Con artists operate off of making up a good story to people who want to believe them every day (JUST TO MAKE PERFECTLY CLEAR THE INTENT OF THIS STATEMENT, I AM NOT IMPLYING HERE THAT CT IS A CON ARTIST OR ANYTHING OTHER THAN A GUY MAKING SOME NICE REPLICA SONICS, SO DO NOT BE A DINK AND TAKE MY WORDS OUT OF CONTEXT).

I really don't give a squirt of piss whether you believe me or not. It makes no difference to me. Those that matter (ie, not you), know that the only way I could have produced such a magnificent piece is by having access to an original.

I (and most of us) have seen replicas that could pass for forgeries that were made from screen caps and publicity photos hundreds of times on this forum. A very good replica can be made by someone with a good eye using just those resources and does not in any way mean access to an original took place (Some times better because the replica looks like what we see on screen which the original props sometimes do not).

Do you honestly think anyone is that good they could produce a piece that is within 0.03mm tolerance of the original prop using eye or just visual material? You are kidding youself and make the object of your asslicking look even worse than they do already. Not even I'm that good and I'm fucking head and shoulders above most of the hacks that call themselves propmakers. Let's be honest here, if I did make such a piece using just screencaps and pics, it makes MFX/Russrep who did have access to a prop look like a bunch of hamfisted monkeys, doesn't it?

CT's Sonics look great, but what exactly is the point in continuing to attack Neil when he has posted proof photos and talked about everything any of us has asked for. Our own screen cap based analysis aside (we know how well that works for color matching), a licensed piece had to get inspected and approved by the BBC. Wouldn't someone have gone "hey this is totally the wrong color" at some point if it did not match the one they used for refrence to some degree (Just Sayin). Why exactly would MFX just make up a color when they obviously (due to photo proof) had direct access to just look at the real one?

Because, you dumb fool, Neill's proof shoots himself in the foot and has been comprehensively and verifiably dismantled by someone a hell of a lot brighter than he is. The majority of people out there know the truth, they know my data is not smoke up their ass and they know that this is a victory of both commonsense and axiomatic fact over puffery and ill-thought out spin. Even those cunts at the BBC must know but will never admit it. So why don't you re-read the evidence, absorb it, allow yourself to be washed over by the deluge of enlightenment that you will surely be engulfed by, and run along to mummy and daddy, tail between your legs, knowing that there is no shame in being soundly spanked by someone intellectually more capable than you will ever be?

EFX Staff Meeting

Neil:

"Ok hear me out on this one, I know this is crazy but the piece we examined was gray but let go ahead and paint this F****er gold!!!!!. The prop collectors love it when you do stuff like this. What do you guys think?"

EFX Team response

Is this really reasonable or do all just like to argue?

You know what? Never a truer word said in jest.

I think we are being very unfair calling Neil a lier based on screen caps and photos of the sonic with the finish obviously heavily worn. The MFX is obviously made to look new and not beat up. If there are only three colors and one is out of the question, could it be the white worn white? Maybe, could it be the worn gold, maybe. Do we know exactly what either color looks like after it has been heavily used and striped and repainted over and over. My question is why would he not have just called Nick Robatto and asked what color paint he uses on them? Neil makes the alien effects for the show, Robatto is obviously on speed dial. It simple does not make any sense. "

That is a very good question. I know the secret to this paint and I even alluded to it about two years ago when I announced my sonics and so do several other people, even Mr Robatto himself but that is another story for another time. Whether it will be told is something that you will all have to wonder what this secret is. One hint though. Look at the crackle patterns, therein lies all manner of secrets to be unlocked.

So this brings me full circle. Humankind may well be shit, and one might do well to aspire to be the turd that floats, but with one major caveat:  one mustn't develop such bouyancy that Mr Phez has displayed tonight and steadfast become that annoying floater that just won't flush.

Time to bring out the loo brush I think....

ADDENDUM: Just to make sure that the moron Phez is 100% clear on this point, I have never claimed access to the Tennant prop just the Season 1 prop. My replica has been extrapolated from the Season 1 prop.