Technical Problems

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The charge of the shite brigade

This was posted yesterday on the Gallifrey Base forum by Gorton's loyal foot soldiers in defence of Neill Gorton's supposedly 'accurate' sonic screwdriver. Like the legendary light brigade, I applaud their bravery and belief although ultimately their efforts are futile and fly contrary to objective proof. (My response in Red)

The first is from Barry Jones at EFX:

"As Neill jumped in to confirm, the MFX Sonic Screwdriver is an EXACT COPY of "one" of the sonic screwdrivers used during series four. I have the pics and measurements to prove it. As Neill also pointed out, as is the norm, multiple versions of a prop exist on a show that's been in production for years and they all vary in little ways depending on who made them, and how closely they followed what went before.

So, yes, it is an EXACT COPY of a screen used prop, and to the 400 plus folks out there, including me, who own this marvelous piece of Who memorabilia, it's not a piece of junk. It's rather fantastic.

Barry"

 

Barry, are you some kind of blind fucking moron? I challenge you to prove what you wrote. You seem to forget, I too have measured the prop and have a complete set of plans, measurments and engineering drawings. There is no way IN HELL, that what MFX delivered is exactly the same as what was measured.

 

How do you explain the discrepancy in head window placement? Or the fact that the strut thickness is 2 thirds too thin???? Or the fact that the lens cap is totally the wrong shape and the emitter lip is the wrong shape? (amongst many other things). This is not imagined. This is FACT you dumb fucking shit. Don't insult my intelligence.

 

If you want to prove it, we can. Shall we send a copy of your original measurements of the prop that Neill pictured plus an MFX sonic to a trusted third party for impartial measurement? I am sure suitable trusted candidates can be identified.

 

If someone was to sue MFX, this whole matter can be proven once and for all. In fact, if anyone wants to sue MFX, I will fund the case.

 

 

David Howe, of 'Transcendental Toybox' fame also had this to add.

 

"Does anyone remember the Channel 4 show Manhattan Cable - presented by flame-haired temptress Laurie Pike ("Hair-Low, Aaaam Laaaaaurie Pike..." etc etc). There was one episode featuring clips from a New York cable show in which a crazy religious woman claimed the Pope had been assasinated and replaced by an imposter Pope. To back up her argument she used a series of photos taken from different angles, citing that you could tell the one on the right was an imposter because (at that angle) the nose looked two centimetres longer.....!

Ring any bells? (And I certainly hope she never got into prop collecting!)"

 

David, aside from the fact that a forty something year old man should really have something better to do than to play with toys,  an archetypal anorak like you should really have more of an eye for detail. I refer you to my answer to Barry above and to my previous posts. If you honestly think that I am misinterpreting photographic data, you must be an even bigger knobend that you appear (and from what I've seen you do come over as a total dildo). You cannot argue with side on photos on fucking graph paper!!!!!!

 

You may think photographic evidence is not compelling but I do. In your case, it's damning. As from whatever angle I look at you from, you're still a cunt. 

 

I find it quite amusing that Neill Gorton also claims that 'his' sonic was used for some of Tennant's publicity pics.  I only recall the spring loaded EFX sonic prototype actually being used for the last scene on Voyage of the Damned. The funny thing is, Gorton has yet to post proof of this rather bold statement. I say bold as:

a) I have seen pretty much every publicity shot released and I scrutinise them microscopically. I have yet to see a single shot of the MFX style sonic. Gorton has yet to post a pic of said publicity shots.

b) Tennant filmed his last shots and took his last publicity pics months in the early summer of 2009 and the fact that MFX's production sonics were not ready until Mid October, Gorton must have access to a real TARDIS! Even if Tennant did use one of Nick Robatto's 'prototypes', they are still original props made by the same prop maker as the original props, and as I have proven, they bear no real resemblance to the MFX travesties.

Our buddy Primrodo talks about multiple props and multiple makers. Actually, Justin, if you get with the program you will realise they claimed to have copied (or mostly claimed - the story shifts depending on how Gorton is feeling), a single Nick Robatto made hero prop. In any case, there were only ever two official on staff propmakers, Penny Howarth who made the original Season 1 prop and Nick Robatto who did the Tennant version remakes. (There was also a company that made resin duplicates for Season 1). Penny's work and Nick's work is very distinct but the dimensions and proportions remain generally consistent. Finishing and assembly accounts for the variations and none expalin the blatant liberties that MFX have taken with the dims on their replica. Kind of pisses on the notion that different makers account for the variations, doesn't it?  

How to get a screen accurate Sonic Screwdriver from MFX

Before I go on, I suggest you all read this: http://celestialtoystore.blogspot.com/2009/11/gorton-answers-questionsort-of-actually.html

As you can see, Gorton's own words have painted a staggeringly inconsistent and downright contradictory picture of the MFX sonic screwdriver.

These inconsistencies will come back to haunt him as I have identified that legally, MFX have painted themselves into a bit of a tricky corner. Let me elaborate on this.

Mfx have sold their sonic screwdriver as a totally screen accurate prop replica. They have claimed to have measured and replicated a single prop. This prop:

He states on his website "All the measurements, dimensions, materials and paints used are exact to the original filming prop used by David Tennant"

However, I have shown that this is utter rubbish as virtually no dimensions match. See here: http://celestialtoystore.blogspot.com/2009/10/analysis-of-mfx-sonic-screwdriver-and.html

Gorton has subsequently changed his story and stated that any differences in his version were down to there being several different props but he himself stated that he used a SINGLE prop for reference (the one above) ergo his replica should be identical as promised.

MFX have therefore contracted with you, the buyer, to supply a replica that is 100% identical to the prop above.

Furthermore, on their website, and on their current March Sale flyer, they post a picture of their prototype. This one (the top one):

A prototype that IS virtually identical to the prop but far from identical to the replica they actually have supplied. They have used a picture of a materially different item to that supplied as part of their sales description.

MFX have not only misrepresented their product in law, but also is in breach of the UK Sale of Goods Act 1979 S.13(1)

Section 13(1) provides that where the buyer is sold goods by description, the goods must correspond with this description.

Clearly, the goods supplied do not correspond with the description.

This is very, very easy to prove in court:

The above prop which they claim to have copied and an MFX replica should be compared and measured in court.

The sonic screwdriver used for the sales picture should also be compared also. I bet that this sonic too, would not be the same as the MFX replicas supplied to customers.

Under the law of misrepresentation (of which I am sure Neill Gorton is guilty of fraudulent misrepresentation), you can sue for either damages or you can have the contract rescinded. This really doesn't help you get a screen accurate sonic out of MFX. Indeed, Neill Gorton has magnanimously agreed to refund anyone who is unhappy with the accuracy of their sonic. A cop-out that avoids legal action and the prop and replica being measured in court, no doubt.

However, there is another way.

You start an action in the UK County Court and claim for breach of contract under the Sale of Goods Act 1979 S13(1) and having established the prop and the replica are substantially different, you request 'Specific Performance'.

Specific Performance is an equitable remedy in UK law that requires a party to perform what they were obliged to do under the contract. In this case, supply a screen accurate sonic as promised and as illustrated in the photo they showed.

Usually specific performance is quite difficult to get as a remedy as most contractual claims tend  to involve personal services or fungible goods (ie, goods that can be exchanged like-for-like on an open market). However, in this case the sonic screwdrivers that MFX are supplying are non-fungible in nature and also exhibit characteristics of being unique in character since they are only available from MFX. Therefore damages cannot adequately compensate since you cannot go and purchase another sonic screwdriver like it.

So there you have it. My advice, if you can be bothered, is to sue MFX on the grounds listed above and request specific performance.

Being the spineless chickenshit that he is, Neill Gorton will probably offer you a full refund. You should stick to your guns and refuse. Take the fucker to court and I guarantee you will win on the grounds stated. If anything, it will prove once and for all whether Neill's dimensions on his replica are all wrong.

The Emperor's New Clothes

Like a glutton for punishment, it appears that Neill Gorton is still in denial over the lack of accuracy of his sonic screwdriver despite the absolute objective proof being laid out here. This blind bearded wanker, supported by yet another blind bearded wanker (a 'Barry' from EFX) steadfastly adheres to the bullshit notion that the MFX is somehow 'screen accurate'. The fuck it is.

Tell you what Gorton, if you are so adamant of this, why don't you avail yourself of the comment box below, and SWEAR on the life of your unborn child that your sonic is an exact 1:1 replica of the prop?

You must think we are all stupid and blind. I have set out the objective facts. Any dickhead buyer of an MFX can take a pair of Verniers and see for themselves.

It amazes me what weak minded sheep Doctor Who fans can be. Just because you are told something you believe it. It's like that stupid myth that CO supplied their toys for use as props on the show. Despite every proof otherwise, the bullshit persists. Just like Neil claiming to have measured a prop and then duplicating it 100%. I'll say right now I don't think Neill measured the bloody prop at all. This is the prop alleged to have been copied and below is MFX's supposed identical copy.

They may look similar but if you happen to know the original prop like I do, you'd see that it's inaccurate in almost every single dimension.

Neill's apparent prototypes were the same as the prop. No question. That's because MFX didn't make them. Nick Robatto, the original propmaker, did. If you still have the prop Neill, why don't you show it off? In fact, how come that your website does not show one of your screwdrivers? The small, rather blurry picture on the MFX site is actually one of Robatto's. If MFX had it in their possession you'd think they would be keen to photgraph it in high res from every single angle and show it off to the world?

Those that still think it is accurate are fools. Sycophantic fuckwits who, like those who applauded the Emperor's new clothes, do so because they are weakminded yes men who allow themselves to be controlled by silly cunts who are after your hard earned cash.

Which brings me on to my next gripe....

What really fucking pisses me off is what a spineless bunch of fuckers some of you are. I know that there are a lot of you out there who agree with me. Hell, I know that there are some of you who already own an MFX and are not happy with it. Question for you then:

WHY THE FUCK DON'T YOU GROW SOME GONADS AND ACTUALLY CALL THAT CUNT NEILL GORTON OUT ON IT??????

He cannot do anything. Why are you so afraid of doing so? Because you are afraid of confrontation? Or are you afraid that he might accuse you of being a CT supporter? Shouldn't basic truth, honesty and integrity be way more important than the feelings of a deluded idiot? That twat can't do a thing to you for pointing out objective truth.

We know the man lies. He has lied, still lies and will continue to lie yet because he happens to work on the show it seems to make it all ok. We know that the BBC took the licence from him because the sonic screwdriver was basically, crap, not that he surrendered it. Even those close to him have confirmed what a deluded prick he is.

I though about this long and hard and had decided against doing this but since Gorton is being such a cock, I'm going to reveal a legal way you can insist on Gorton actually delivering you a screen accurate Sonic. If he doesn't you, you can prove, in court, that his sonic is indeed as inaccurate as I have proven it is and force MFX to make you a new one. Stay tuned.

New Player?

No sooner than MFX's replica business hit the skids than the BBC have lined up a brave new (and dare I say, foolhardy) player to take over the licence for the Eccleston/Tennant era sonic and these guys apparently want to manufacture them here in China!

Doesn't bother me too much as I know I have the better product but what irks is the fact the silly cunts at BBC Licensing continue to reject my overtures.

Whoever does inherit the Sonic licence from MFX is guaranteed to inherit a poisoned chalice - I will make sure of it. Firstly, making a screen accurate sonic is not easy. Secondly, with my head start and the various tricks I have up my sleeve, they will find themselves flogging a dead horse. Despite what they think, the market for high quality sonic screwdrivers is pretty small and what with MFX and myself playing in the same sandbox the market has become pretty saturated.

However, the biggest issue against the new boys is timescales and complexity. Let's look at it from an objective perspective: The new series sonics are complex bits of engineering and design. I am the best at what I do and even for me, with direct access to an original prop, it took the best part of five years, three years of which was solid R&D: tooling, materials and CAD models had to be developed and researched. The electronics for sound had to be developed and miniaturized from scratch. It may seem like an inconsequential thing but developing a 6mm sound chip is incredibly difficult. It's 40% smaller than a CO toy chip!!!!

The new guys haven't even got the licence yet. They are still thrashing out a deal so a prototype is not even in the offing. To make a screen accurate prototype requires prop access, detailed measurements and they will need to design out some of the inherent flaws of the prop. This all takes time, money and skill. I've already done it all. I've got tooling, I've got 3D models and blueprints and I've got a finished product. Even if they were to start now and work their balls off, they will have missed this year's window for sales as retailers would have already planned their sales inventory for the next year so unless they sell directly, they can already write off this year for a release. So we look to 2011.....by which time Matt Smith and a whole new sonic will be on the scene and the new sonic will be the 'old' sonic and sales will be nowhere in the same league as a new sonic which will be seen onscreen from April...

So what can they do? They can take advantage of the work I have done cut a deal to purchase my sonic from me, off the shelf and I go legit. Or if they are going to be total cunts, they can do an Ian Crichton and buy one of mine and copy it like Iconic did with the TLP sonic. However if they do that I will obliterate them in a hail of fire, brimstone and Chinese steel, muhahahahaha :-)

So if anyone from my would-be competition is reading this and wants to go up against me, good luck, you're going to need it. However, I'm going to make the same offer to you that I made to Gorton and MFX. Work with me and everyone wins. Decline the offer and someone has to lose.

If anyone knows any more about this or who the new licensee is, email me

Not such a great deal

So MFX's much vaunted fire sale of Sonic Screwdrivers is under way....

....and the magic price is £145!!!!

Nice.

Until you do the math.

Let's see.....

£145 for Sonic Screwdriver

Plus

£43.92 for shipping (£5.89 if you live in UK and £63.25 if you live 'down under')

Plus

17.5% VAT chargeable on both sonic and shipping

[Plus any customs duties/import tax and admin fees at you end (up to 25% in some places)]

Equals....

£221.98 (+  up to £47.23 local duties)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All in all, still more expensive than my sonic at £217 inclusive of p&p and NO duties payable (and mine is screen accurate and has sound :-))

The real winners will be UK customers who will only have to pay £177.30 in total, about £40 less than mine. Still, with the differences in product having been pointed out, is my sonic worth £40 more? That depends on what you're after and what compromises you will accept for an extra £40 in your pocket.

I just feel sorry for MFX's overseas customers. They are not getting a good deal but certainly getting a slightly better deal than you poor fuckers who bought then at full price in the first place. 

MFX Replicas bites the dust

Following on from my last blog post regarding the MFX fire sale Neill Gorton posted the following on the RPF yesterday:

"Hi all

There’s an announcement going up on the website tomorrow but thought I’d give RPF members a heads up and a bit more detail about a change at MFXReplicas. Our license for Doctor Who prop replicas is up for renewal and I’ve decided to not to continue with it. There are some very simple reasons for this and, even though I’d find the speculation amusing, the reality is fairly mundane and has been planned for and anticipated by us for the past twelve months.

First and foremost our Replicas are a business and one that has been running for over 5 years. When we launched we also, as a little sideline, began selling how to DVD’s and more recently ready-made prosthetics. Last year we re-branded the site MFXWarehouse when it became apparent that our other lines where actually becoming a much more viable and profitable business than the Replicas. The Replicas are enormously time consuming and, due to the fact that we’ve kept production of them in-house to maintain quality, they’ve always been a low profit margin cottage industry and, frankly, a bit of a labor of love. I looked in to stepping up production and outsourcing manufacture to China a couple of years ago but was never wholly satisfied that I’d be able to manufacture to the quality and standard I, and our customers, would demand.

Another factor has come in to play in the past five years and that is the success of the parent company “Millennium FX” and our teaching facility, the “Neill Gorton Prosthetics Studio”. They’ve both continued to go from strength to strength and we had an outstanding year last year with huge projects such as “The Wolfman” to our name and the demands on my time have meant it’s become increasingly more and more difficult to find the time to develop new lines for MFXReplicas. So, last year, knowing the license was coming up for renewal this spring, we made a decision to start reviewing the viability of the Replicas line and weigh up whether we’d continue pursuing the replicas business or concentrate our efforts on the more profitable and, frankly, easier to manage aspects of our business. We re-branded the website in anticipation of this being a possible direction for us. Ultimately, when we reviewed the business, it was clear that the investment of time and money required to compete with other companies, in what is already a saturated market, just didn’t make sense. Why fight and gamble financially to be a medium sized fish in a big pond when, with our core business of Film and TV special effects doing so well, we’re already a big fish in a small pond! For five years the Replicas has existed as a ‘bolt on’ business and to turn it in to a much bigger concern would take an enormous investment and shift in our core business practice. Looking forwards we realized that, to make it a more viable and profitable business, we’d need to diversify in to other licenses outside of Doctor Who and the cost of doing this, tooling for new product lines and the financial investment, and time investment, to get them up and running, was simply too big a push when my core team is already stretched managing our existing diverse interests and the demands on my time in other areas are already stretching me.

You may have noticed that there’s more DVD’s on sale on the website recently. We can shoot and edit a DVD in a fraction of the time it takes to develop a new product and at a fraction of the cost and it can all be done in house without a licensor to please. In addition we take 100% of the profit. In the past year we have made a better profit from DVD’s and ready-made prosthetic than Replicas and with a fraction of the effort. Taking in to account the time, effort and economics it’s become a no brainer!

In addition to all of this I have a little Gorton coming along in June and also wish to make more time for my family. So, somewhere, something’s got to give. As much as I’ve loved making these replicas I’ve got to make a sensible business decision. The end of the license period is a natural cut off point and is also one of the driving factors for our Mad March Sale. When the license runs out we have to stop selling replicas so we have to shift the remainder in the next four weeks. There’s not a lot left so it really is first come first served.

So to all of you who have bought our products and been great supporters and collectors of our products thanks for a smashing five years and those of you that have them I hope you continue to enjoy them in the coming years.

Obviously anyone buying a product in the coming month will still get full customer support beyond the end of March as it’ll still be business as usual at MFX and MFXWarehouse.

Best wishes and thank you.

Neill "

 

This basically confirms what I've heard for a while now: that MFX have lost/returned their Doctor Who merchandise licence and as of April 2010, MFX Replicas will effectively cease to exist. Now Neill Gorton may put a positive spin on it to save face but the account from a reliable source says otherwise. The BBC have revoked the licence due to various issues.

 

At this point you may expect me to start celebrating however I take no satisfaction in this. Some may paint it as a victory of sorts. If it is, it's a pyrrhic one. My issue with MFX has always been that they should not have got the licence to produce prop replicas of props they didn't make in the first place. This opinion has been utterly vindicated by their woefully substandard Sonic Screwdriver.

 

When producing replicas of their own original pieces, such as the Cybermen heads, Oods and other heads and masks, they excel and their pieces would not shame any display. That they will not be selling these anymore is not only a shame but will also encourage recasting.

 

One thing in the above statement does bother me:

 

"I looked in to stepping up production and outsourcing manufacture to China a couple of years ago but was never wholly satisfied that I’d be able to manufacture to the quality and standard I, and our customers, would demand."

This statement is patently untrue. If Gorton had swallowed his pride, used his undeniable intelligence and applied some basic business acumen he could have taken me up on my offer to help him and this whole situation would never have arisen.

I still maintain that I can bang out screen accurate, high quality sonic screwdrivers, cyberman heads, Auton heads, Ood heads and Davros heads for a fraction of the price he is currently shelling out, all day and night if I have to. Everybody wins. Sadly, this was not to be.